Lily Collins Remembers “Poisonous And Emotionally Abusive” Relationship

In a brand new podcast interview, Lily Collins has opened up about being in a poisonous, verbal and emotionally abusive former relationship with an ex-boyfriend whose behaviour made the Emily in Paris star really feel “very small” and triggered emotions of “panic” and “anxiousness.” 

Whereas talking on the We Can Do Hard Things podcast, Collins defined through the relationship she was topic to “verbal and emotional abuse,” including that her ex would name her names to belittle her, similar to “Little Lily.”

“He would name me ‘Little Lily’…and he’d use terrible phrases about me when it comes to what I used to be carrying and would name me a whore and all this stuff,” Collins stated.

“There have been terrible phrases after which there have been belittling phrases,” she continued. “I turned fairly silent and cozy in silence and feeling like I needed to make myself small to really feel tremendous protected.”

Collins went on to disclose that although she’s now in a wholesome relationship together with her husband, Charlie McDowell, who she married in September 2021, she will be able to nonetheless be triggered by her previous.

“The conditions are fully completely different 10 years in the past to now,” Collins stated. “That panic is what I can nonetheless get triggered by.” She defined, “even when I’m in essentially the most wholesome relationship, there generally is a second that occurs all through the day the place historical past comes again like that.”

She continued, “It’s like a millisecond, or shorter than a millisecond, and your intestine reacts, your coronary heart begins beating, and swiftly you’re taken again to that second the place they stated that factor to you 10 years in the past, however you’re not in that state of affairs now and that’s the set off and it’s f–king onerous. it’s terrible.”

Collins went on to reference one thing she learnt in remedy about a facet of evolution related to her response to the abuse on the time.

“When prey felt threatened they made themselves as small as attainable, presumably by not consuming, by making themselves look as least juicy and attractive as attainable and that’s the place they felt the most secure,” Collins, who has opened up prior to now about her struggles with an consuming dysfunction, stated.

“Now in my life, having my fantastic and supportive husband, we do talk and discuss a lot,” she added.